When should I explode my underpants bomb?

By Scimon January 20th, 2010, under Uncategorized

We just had this conversation in our office. When would the best time to explode a bomb in your underpants? Personally I think when you’re not wearing them, and preferably when you are a long way away from them and not in a plane with them. But the conversation covered why setting off your underpant bomb when your plane is landing is a really dumb time.

Of course I don’t have an underpants bomb, nor would I desire to explode one even if I wasn’t anywhere near me, unless it was in an empty quarry and I had a camera. Because y’know blowing shit up is funny. Blowing people up on the other hand is not funny, big or clever. But I’m allowed to think about it and discuss it with my friends. I’m even allowed to play games that feature it in as a core part.

And if I can’t the terrorists have won.

Various gaming stuff

By Scimon January 14th, 2010, under Uncategorized

Yahtzee on Torchlight. I played the demo and enjoyed it, but not enough to buy the game, and I missed it in the Steam sale when I might have got it. Of course the Steam sale was handily chosen to run during the time I know come to think of as the festive money sink time. Weee, it’s Christmas, I bet you didn’t want that money did you? Yay.

Anyway, that’s an aside, I’ve never been a huge computer gamer. (Stop laughing at the back there). I like playing games and I tend to get very into the odd game for a while. Like I’m currently very into Dragon Age. I was very into Champions Online and will probably be again in a bit but I’ve hit level 40 and I’m suffering from a dearth of people to play with. I’ve also got a game of Baldurs Gate II that I’d to get back to because that’s a laugh. But as times gone on I’ve given up on keeping up with the big new game. Mainly because I’ve not got as much time as I used to. Such is life I suppose, you can either be too skint to afford games or not have any time to play them.

Anyone fancy a game of Chez Geek? Or any of the other boards games in my (not as large as I’d like it to be) collection? Ooo yeah that’s a point, some of you older peeps may just recognise Fantasy Flights latest upcoming game. Yup they are redoing Horus Heresy. But in a much bigger box. Suffice to say… I wants one.

Ain’t it cool

By Scimon January 13th, 2010, under Uncategorized

The car park at my office has gone from snow to ice, making it even more fun. Much of England is reacting as normal to the snow by grinding to a halt and blaming someone else. And my fingers have only just started to warm up, thanks mainly to the soup I’m eating. Mmmm soup.

The thing is, we’d best get used to it. Take a look at a map, Glasgow (where I’m currently based) is at the same latitude as Moscow and New Foundland. These are places that are generally known for being a bit chilly in the winter. Nay most of the time. But here in the UK it tends to be damp, damp is a great word to describe our weather. But not, freezing cold with tons of snow, well not normally. And for this we have to thank the Gulf Stream, which runs lots of lovely warm water up the side of the British Isles and keeps us from having to learn how to drive in snow (carefully, calmly and attentively for those thousands of Audi drivers out there). And the thing with the Gulf Stream, like much of the workings of the planet, we’re not completely sure how it works.

Did you know it turned off for 10 days in 2004? I didn’t. And the fun bit is no one is sure why, I don’t know about you but that worries me slightly. The UK is currently doing really well at proving we aren’t set up to cope with long term cold weather. right now the forecast is for things to warm up to a balmy 6-8C real soon now. But what about next year, heck what about next month?

Now when we need to blow the crap out of countries because they’ve not got WMD’s but we think they do, we can find money. When the banks dig a huge hole and then jump into it we can find money to bail them out. Meanwhile the infrastructure of the country is a wreck, and we’re told we’re all going to have to tighten our belts no matter who we vote for this year.

Tighten out belts and put two pairs of socks and a jumper on I think.

Thoughtlet

By Scimon January 8th, 2010, under Uncategorized

Well I’ve been playing Dragon Age : Origins a bit recently. Well as much as I can really, based on the fact it requires access to the TV. Am I the only person who turned off the persistant gore option after one two many conversations between people covered in blood!

I mean surely that would be part of your conversation? But no, your blood drenched ‘heroes’ wander up to people and have a chat and at no point to the people you are talking to react to the thick droplets of blood sprayed all over you. I found that weirder then people finishing an epic battle not covered in blood quite frankly.

Ho hum, back to the coding and stuff.

Get on with it!

By Scimon January 7th, 2010, under Uncategorized

I’m not one of those people who think voting Tory at the upcoming general election is a good idea. I really don’t see that much difference between the people on the Tory side now and those who got kicked out in 1997. On the other hand I don’t really see much difference between the Labour party at the moment and the Tories who got kicked out in 1997 either. The problem is our glorious leaders have embraced new technology when it suits their urge to manage every aspect of our lives but failed to notice it’s other effects.

One thing I hate is the same politicians who use the argument ‘The innocent have nothing to fear from X’, where X is the latest infringement of our civil liberties, like warrant-less house entry or even more CCTV, at the same time argue that their expenses should be kept private. Surely if they are valid expenses they have nothing to fear?

So personally I’d like all this dancing around to be over so I can once again bask in the knowledge that my vote hasn’t made the slightest bit of difference and the same bunch of Neanderthal corporate cronies will wander back into their little gothic box, eat their subsidised salmon, sit on their plush benches (but probably on the other side) and carry on pretending they give a crap.

On a lighter note our bathroom is apparently nearing completion. Polli has some pictures including a new of the work in progress. Plus lots of cats, and other such things. So that’s good.

More soon, I need coffee.

Suicide by search engine

By Scimon January 6th, 2010, under Uncategorized

Suicide by search engine is similar ins concept to the idea of suicide by cop. Basically your blog tries to kill itself by getting lots of search engines to overwhelm it. Ok, I’ll admit it, my current hosting provision is a bit cheap, and my blog is a bit lazy. The cheapness is because I wanted a full server with root access but mostly just to play around with. So I have one (well a virtual one) but it’s not exactly highly powered. Still my blog isn’t what you’d call a hive of activity, most of the people I get on the site are looking at other random pages still hanging about in the site infrastructure. It’s what happens when you’ve had stuff online for 8 years and don’t tend to clean up after your self.

And then there’s my laziness, I could have rolled my own blog. Heck my first blog was in 2001 and was just a bunch of cron scripts and a file I just had open in my text editor. It was great right up until I had to take it down because it was the number one response from Google when you searched for my company site, oops. But I was lazy and went to route of Wordpress. Now don’t get me wrong, Wordpress is lovely and shiny and you can get cool plugins to do things like post to Twitter and Livejournal whenever you post. But it’s also suicidal.

My nice shiny new Virtual Server has a been a bit flaky, I’ve done a bunch of things to try and fix it. Removing stuff that was running that wasn’t required, trying to make sure the Wordpress fake Cron worked correctly and so forth but it still had a tendency to crash. Generally right after I posted something, which as you might guess was a bit annoying. So I tried a few things and finally nailed down the problem. If you are hosting a Wordpress blog and your site keeps getting hammered whenever you post, go check out the Writing Settings options. See by default Wordpress sends a request to Pingomatic when you post and update. This then tells all the search engines that you’ve blogged. And they all come and stomp up and down on your tiny server. Ooops.

So for now I’ve turned it off. I’m not that bothered if it takes Google or Bing a while to notice that I’ve posted and update if it means the site doesn’t fall over. If anyone else has any cool ways round this (that don’t involve me buying a bigger box) I’d love to hear them.

Have fun and stay slinky.

Ennui

By Scimon January 5th, 2010, under Uncategorized

As I said yesterday I need to post more, I like writing and my blog has for a number of years been a creative outlet for me. But recently I’ve found it hard to write anything. This being in large part to my ongoing failure to connect with the world. This year I need to get myself back on track, work out what I want to be doing and actually get it done. Rather than just coast along doing stuff that I find simple.

I have found that I’m losing my temper more often than I used, not seriously in a shouty rage kind of way but more in a generally despairing at the world and the intelligence of those in it. I need to calm down on that one and remember I’m as much of an idiot as all the Audi drivers out there. In my mind the driving of an Audi pretty much puts you into the moron category… It’s terrible I know.

Meanwhile my kitten, he’s my kitten when he’s being bad, is still a crazy ass mofo and is causing Amelie severe levels of stress. Mostly because she can’t seem to grasp the concept of hitting him really hard on the head. But it’s getting to the point where we’re probably going to have to get rid of him. Which is a shame since between his bouts of manic attack kitty energy he’s a cute little fur ball. Sometimes I think it’s because we don’t play with him enough, our other cats all had each other to play with but that’s not working out as well in this case. It’s all rather sad.

Work on ‘I Can Has XP’ has stalled, again, mainly because I can’t get the enthusiasm to write any and partly because I haven’t got a regular gaming group going. Plus I think there’s an echo in my head, or I’m suffering from deja vu.

Meanwhile the country gears up for a general election on a wave of apathy. Everyone tries to work out which of two piles of venal idiots to vote into power whilst arguing that no one else can be taken seriously. I really shouldn’t think too hard about such things, they just depress me.

I got Dragon Age for [winter gift giving holiday] which is really cool, but as it’s on the PS3 I don’t get to play it as much as I’d like (I.E. all the time I’m at home) as other people want to watch TV. Still my PC wouldn’t actually be able to run it so I’ll take what I can get.

GUGS starts again next week (apparently, feel free to tell me I’m wrong) so I shall see if I can get an adventure of XP written somehow… Hmmmm.

Anyway, that’s enough random thoughts, perhaps tomorrow I’ll have a plan. Oh yes, side note, I’m reading Game Night again. It’s still a very funny book, which if you haven’t read and don’t want to buy (shame) can also be found serialised on EN World.

New Year

By Scimon January 4th, 2010, under Uncategorized

It’s Monday, it’s 2010, maybe I should blog something?

I’m not making any resolutions for this year in order to not add to my levels of disappointment. I will do my best to get excited about a project and see it through to finishing. Though to quote The Rock “Losers always whine about their best, winners get to go home and f**k the prom queen”. Much more pithy than Yoda if you ask me.

After the whole exploding appendix episode I’m feeling a lot more perky and am looking forward to trying to get a regular gaming/social life type thing going. It’d be fun.

I’m also going to write more here. Honest.

Still here

By Scimon December 16th, 2009, under Uncategorized

A lot has happened in the last few months, including my appendix deciding it couldn’t take it any more and trying to take me with it. Leading to a rather large hole being cut in my stomach and a spell in hospital. Fun, fun, fun. I’m mostly healed now, still getting twinges from the wound and I’m rather tired but I’m getting there. So I figured I should post something.

I’m hoping to do more here next years than i have for a while, I may move from Wordpress to something more roll your own (we shall see). And I have a plan for a theme to next years blog, more on that if I get round to it. but I’m mostly posting because I’ve just listened to Tim Mincin’s White Wine In The sun and it made me cry. I may very buy it and possibly some Rage Against the Machine too as I think either would be funny as Xmas number one. If you’ve not heard it yet here is be.

Small post about the NHS

By Scimon October 16th, 2009, under Uncategorized

So I got my feet X-Rayed yesterday. Which is hopefully a step in the right direction in the ongoing “Scimon walks like a penguin, a drunk penguin” issue. Of course the final destination may be “Sorry, not much we can do. Here’s some inserts and would you like some pain management?” but it’s something.

But what got me was the options for pain management that were mentioned, Steroid Injections and (drum roll here) Acupuncture.

On the NHS.

I politely replied in the negative to this one, saying (and I quote) “I’d rather now have the Acupuncture because firstly I’ve got an intense fear of needles and secondly I don’t believe in it. So even if there’s a placebo effect I won’t get that.”

Which considering my usual desire to not offend people was pretty strong stuff. Anyhow, there are many things to do, so I shall got and do them.