Because really, everyone wants it dead, well almost everyone. Microsoft don’t want it, they keep trying to kill it but give up mere seconds before pulling the trigger. Web Professionals have been trying to bury it in the back garden for years, and that’s real years not non literal ‘literally years’ years, they don’t mind if it’s still twitching they’ve already had the funeral and want to get on with the wake. But it’s still with us, grimly holding on and forcing us to keep using really really stupid workarounds to do perfectly simple things, because the men in suites point at the browser stats and say ‘Look, there IE6, people still use it, develop for it’.

But who are these people? Who has managed to not notice anything to do with new web browsers for the last few years? Who has gleefully ignored the blandishments from Microsoft for use IE7 or 8, and sung loudly to drown out the sweet nothings being whispered by Firefox, Safari, Chrome or even Opera? Who? Who!!!!?

It’s the IT department. You see Microsoft got themselves, and all of us, into this situation when the web was young and the bubble had yet to burst. See they saw this whole internet thing and at first ignored it and when that didn’t work they came up with a new plan. ActiveX, which well all now admit was a really f’in stupid plan. But they sold it to lots of companies as a sure fire way of doing new internal systems. And there are a lot of these internal systems, a huge stonking pile of them. Think about it, there are still jobs for COBOL programmers (not disrespect) because the banks still have huge mainframes they spent lots of money on running lots of COBOL. And if that’s the case what’s the likelihood of a company spending lots of money upgrading their internal ActiveX/ASP system? You know, the one that was written by a consulting firm that long since gone bust, has no source code and uses a undocumented data format? The one that works fine with IE6 but not with any other web browser ever?

See when I put it like that it becomes obvious, we’re stuck with IE6 until Microsoft say they won’t support it any more, but they won’t do that because then all the governments of the world will stop paying for Windows licences as if they have to upgrade they might as well upgrade to a free OS… vicious circle there.

This wouldn’t be a problem except for the fact that the same companies that think spending money on a new computer is a frivolous expense when the money could be better spent on tickets to Royal Ascot or something… where was I? Oh yes, the same companies that aren’t upgrading to IE6 also don’t like their staff using the internet for non work related activities, despite the fact the the world is migrating to the internet faster than a dubious joke about migration to a stand up comedians routine… These companies therefore don’t see any need in installing a second web browser on their staff’s machines, what’s the point, they’d only surf the net with it. Which means when the staff do have the use the internet at work, and there really are loads of reason they might not just Tweeting, Facebooking or reading my blog, apparently, they have to use IE6. Which means, the usage number for IE6 are artificially inflated.

But Simon, you wearily sigh, we know all this, have you really written 650 words just to rambling tell us this? Yes! Not wait, there’s more. There have been a number of ideas put forward for fixing this issue, including redirecting old web browsers to pages telling them the site doesn’t work. But the thing is to get companies and governments to actually upgrade we need to hit them where it hurts, the bottom line. So here’s my plan. Step closer it’s a doozy.

Firstly we find the companies using IE6, that’s easy, we watch our access logs and pick up on IE6 page requests and log the IP address. Then we close our firewalls to these IP addresses, and add them to an insecure browser blacklist that we share amongst ourselves. When people call to ask why they’ve been blacklisted explain that you have detected requests from insecure non supported software coming from their address. Explain that you can’t take the risk of exposing your network to them.

Of course this will only really get noticed in the boardrooms if we get the ‘adult’ sites to join in and that’s unlikely. So the next part of the plan involves finding every company that won’t upgrade from IE6 and boycotting them, then they’ll notice. I figure we start with the governments, though how one boycotts a government I’m not sure. More though on that is required. I would say write to your MP but I know what mine would say, “This isn’t a real problem, only namby pamby wishy washy liberals like yourself would worry about it”. “But Iain,” I would reply, not stooping to his level of name calling, “it wastes time and money across the WORLD as we have to work round this useless piece of crap. I know the shiny word box confuses you old man!” Ok maybe a bit of name calling “But it’s the future, get with the programme”.

And this is why I try not to speak to my MP. But anyway, my point is, the time for subtly is over, we need to start hitting them where it hurts, in the pocket book. If the companies start to lose money then people will start to take it seriously. Otherwise we’re just left, ranting into the dark, and thinking we’re making a difference.

Side note, if you use IE6 through choice… stop. If you use it because you have to then share, out those soulless minions of pain who have forced you to do it and maybe we can get something done.

But probably not.

As I approached the Shoppe a young gentleman accosted me, he seemed personable and of good character so I refrained from striking him and continuing on my way. He seemed most intent in asking me some questions from a board he carried and I decided to humor him for the weather was pleasant and I felt that all was right in the world.

I confess I do not remember the meat of his questions, but I recall he was asking me to think about what I treasured and needed in life, to which I responded smiling and breathing. I do recall that by the last question I had so confused the poor chap I had to lean over and read it from his clip board. It was, I think, of these what do you treasure most, to which I replied ‘Breathing, because without that I’d not be able to enjoy the others.’ The next stage of the script involved him inviting me to his ‘church’ for a free stress test. I politely declined, his sense of relief was palpable and I left him to consider his lot in life.

And so I walked away from the poor fool, lamenting in my mind how anyone could be taken in by such and organisation who existed only to take the money from the deluded, and finished my journey to the Shoppe. It is only now many, many, years later I realise the irony of these thoughts.

So hopefully the new party will do quite well, and maybe at some point we’ll all find out exactly what they are running away from. More on that later…

It’s on page 28, second paragraph under Generate Characteristics of the WFRP 3rd edition rulebook. And despite having run through character generation 3 times I completely and failed to notice it.

Thus all my players have effectively missed out on 6-8 character creation points. I’m currently feeling a bit of a muppet.

I thought I’d share this information partly by way of an apology and partly for if you have missed it yourself or played in one of my games and are now running it for other people. Pick race, pick career, add primary attributes to race attributes spend points, in that order.

Doh.

Neutral Stance, no white or yellow Vs Difficulty

Remember that the lower your stat the more likely you are to face higher difficulty rolls whenever you contest against an opponent.

Stat at 3, changing stance Reckless Vs Difficulty

Stat at 3, changing stance Conservative Vs Difficulty

Please note these tests are only looking at success, not any side effects. Anyway, I’ll leave that for you to ponder.

First up, like many point spend based games character gen involves balancing various shiny options. Yes there’s a lovely table of Skills, Trait, Actions and Cash you can spend things on. But you really, really don’t want to look at that until you’ve bought your stats. Buy lots of lovely stats and then work out how to spend the last few points. Because if your stats are low you’re not going to live long enough to use your shiny toys. Also it’s very hard to buy stats up later in the game, you’ll basically need to save up all your advances to do so whilst actions, traits and skills can all easily be increased. And getting money is what adventuring is all about now isn’t it.

Oh, you’re playing a foppish dandy or a wizard so you don’t need a Toughness above 2? This is true, much in the same way you don’t NEED lungs. In the long run, and probably the short run, it’ll have the same effect. Seriously Toughness is really important. Not only does Toughness help soak damage it also sets your wound threshold and helps protect against Fatigue. Do not underestimate Fatigue, it can quickly build up and then you pass out and goblins stab your comatose body.

And on that note Willpower 2 is another sure fire way of getting to play with character generation really soon, after you’ve had a chance to experience the insanity rules. The first time you meet something with Fear you might as well take a nice long last look at the world because you aren’t going to be there long.

As for the other Stats just remember, the more dice you roll the better. That and they cost lots to get later on. Once you’ve spent pretty much everything on Stats take a look at the other options, which to pick really depends on you but being Trained in a skill is nice, and specialisations add a certain something too.

Actions and Traits can be fun but I think you might want to cut down on them, the more options a starting character has the more likely you are to forget something or make a mistake. If you start with less options you can learn the character and build from there.

Anyway, I’m going to go and work out just what happened to Stromdorf after the PC’s completely failed and next week we’ll try again. It’ll be grand.

Which is of course one of the things that depresses me, that it’s only in the last few weeks that the Lib Dems have been taken seriously, that those who don’t ascribe to the tribalism have thought “Hmm maybe a vote for them won’t be wasted”. And of course there were all the people voting for a hung Parliment, many of whom now seem to be a bit put out. I have one question for them, what did you want?

As far as I can tell they wanted something different to Labour and the Tories but not, y’know, while actually changing anything. What’s really pissing me off is the people moaning like fuck about the fact that the Lib Dems have decided to actually be politicians. They’ve been saying we need consensus politics, you can’t say that and then when the option comes up go ‘Actually we were kidding, we want consensus with them not you’.

I’m of the firm belief that a minority Tory government would have screwed up for a year or two and then there would have been another election. An election where the Labour party would have either have torn themselves apart and been skint and the Lib Dems would have taken the rap for the failures of the Tories because they lied about wanting stable government.

If there’s one group of idiots I’m really not happy with this morning it’s the Labour party who after screwing up and ripping up civil liberties for 13 years thought that playing the “We’re still not the Tories” card again would work. I remember talking to my MP, who lives in his nice safe Labour seat, who basically told me that real people didn’t worry about Civil Liberties and MP’s expenses. Because I’m not a real person. To the Labour party real people are solid working class types (despite the fact I’ve been in work pretty much constantly since I was 11) who do what they are told and vote the way their parents do. That kind of tribal thinking pisses me off, it’s one of the reasons I can’t stand football (that and I’m not a sport in general).

Sorry angry rant. My point is you can be pessimistic or optimistic about the future. Pessimism is easy, hell you’re likely to be right, if for no other reason than you’ll not try anything. I know this, I’ve fallen into that trap too many times. Optimism is harder, because it’s so easy to lose, but only if you’re optimistic can you get to the bright future you’re dreaming of because a pessimist won’t dream of it.

See… I’ve been in the anyone but the Tory camp for years, generally voting Lib Dem, then I decided that it wasn’t any good to pick the lesser of two evils because they are still evil. Part of me hates the concept of this deal, but I pride myself on rationality and being able to admit when I was wrong. I’m hoping, optimistically, that this will go well, I’m not expecting perfection, though it would be nice. I hoping the country can get a little better. I know that if we don’t try and make it better though it never will.

If a deal is agreed between Messrs Cameron and Clegg, the Lib Dems’ so-called “triple lock” procedure comes into play. Mr Clegg must get support from at least three-quarters of his MPs, and also three-quarters of the Federal Executive – made up of activists, regional representatives and a handful of MPs and peers. If he does, the deal goes ahead. If he can’t, a special conference of party members is convened to vote on the deal. If that also fails to produce a two-thirds majority, Mr Clegg has to consult all members of his party and must get the consent of a majority to proceed.

You see it’s not the ‘Liberal’ party, it’s the ‘Liberal Democrats’ we have a democratic procedure for doing things (still find the we a bit weird). This is why for instance we don’t support nuclear power, something I’m seriously thinking about going to the next party conference and raising as an issue.

Assuming there is a party conference.

But the point is, there can’t be a back room deal. A deal can be proposed but eventually it has to be voted on by the party in some form.

And the Government did nothing. Well no. They carried on with their plans regardless of the feelings of such a large amount of people. The carried on because they knew there was nothing we could do.

And they were right, because at the 2005 election they stayed in power, despite launching a war the excuses for which has unravelled into a pack of lies.

Did anyone really think a few thousand people complaining on the internet about a damn stupid bill were going to make a difference?