Ok Ok.

I’m going to start work on I Can Has XP again. To whet you appetite here’s some random text from it:

One of the major failings with the Ubermind’s plan to protect the world from the Alien menace is that a cat’s brain, even one that has been nanotech enhanced really isn’t that big, plus they tend to get distracted by shiny things and anything the moves quickly near them. In order to try and make space for information on building invisible vehicles and ray guns the Ubermind radically reduced the English language, stripping out syntax and generally mangling it as required. Even so your average LOL-Cat is still not amazingly gifted with intellect, tending to rely on luck and manic energy instead, the little brain power they do have is represented by their Smarts stat.

And

Generally LOL-Cats are Atheists, they know they were created by the Ubermind and why. But some have had the truth of the Flying Spaghetti Monster revealed to them, they know his Noodley Goodness touches everything in the universe. A Noodlista can focus his mind to ask for aid from his God, by moving items, clouding others minds or other manifestations.

Plus

Thus it was that another ‘scientific research’ mission was sent to Earth, in fact the Vashtari came hoping to get more ideas from Earth and it’s unique inhabitants. While they had already become the wealthiest race in the galaxy, they needed more and they hoped to find things that they’d missed in their first reconnaissance. They did learn a number of new ideas, such as strip mining, mortgaging and repossession, the power of monopoly and just how much politicians love money. After a few years on Earth though they realised they were getting less and less done. More than half of the crew were spending most of their time watching television programmes, either live or those recorded and stored in the ship’s archives. Studies were made, hampered by when the entire medical staff started watching ‘I Love Lucy’ a few months into the proceedings, which eventually found that television programmes as well as being horribly addictive, caused long term brain damage to all normal Galactic races. The humans bizarre brains seemed to give them some measure of protection.

I promise I wasn’t smoking anything.

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